Awesomeness Alert!!! JULIET IMMORTAL by Stacey Jay, my dear friend and writing partner, hits bookshelves August 9th!!

I can’t recommend this story highly enough and not just because it’s dedicated to me (although it is and I will be honest–having a book dedicated to you is pretty awesome). I loved this story WAY before it was a “real”book,before it was even a book deal. Let me tell you why:

Because Romeo and Juliet (yes, the Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare) is lame. There. I said it. Somewhere, right now, a University official has started proceedings to revoke my English degree. But it’s true! Yes, Shakespeare is a master of language and brilliant and who am I to critique him, blah, blah, blah, but that doesn’t make R & J any less lame. Think about it. Juliet killed herself over a guy she knew for less than a week! That’s not romantic. That’s . . . crazy. And Romeo–don’t even get me started on him. He didn’t love Juliet. He was in love with the idea of being in love. (Hello, Rosaline, anyone?)

Enter Stacey and her awesome creative powers. She has crafted an entirely new kind of Juliet, a Juliet who is brave, and strong, and makes me proud to be a girl instead of want to vomit. I urge everyone to check it out–even if you love the original R & J.

Here is the “official” description:

“These violent delights have violent ends
And in their triumph die, like fire and powder,
Which as they kiss consume.”
—Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

The most tragic love story in history . . .

Juliet Capulet didn’t take her own life. She was murdered by the person she trusted most, her new husband, Romeo Montague, a sacrifice made to ensure his own immortality. But what Romeo didn’t anticipate was that Juliet would be granted eternity, as well, and would become an agent for the Ambassadors of Light. For 700 years, she’s fought Romeo for the souls of true lovers, struggling to preserve romantic love and the lives of the innocent. Until the day she meets someone she’s forbidden to love, and Romeo, oh Romeo, will do everything in his power to destroy that love.

To the Person Who Shot Our Dog:

If you are the cattle owner across the street and he was bothering your herd, thank you. I respect you for shooting him in the leg instead of mortally wounding him.

I mean that sincerely. You would have been well within your legal rights to kill him, and you didn’t. Thank you. Please accept my sincere apology for any trouble he caused. We did not realize he was still going onto your property. We will strive to make sure it does not happen again.

If you are NOT the cattle owner across the street, and you shot our dog because you are bored / cruel / a budding serial killer, you stink. If I knew who you were and had magical witch powers, I would make a voodoo doll of you & jab a straight pin right through the knee so that you would be in as much pain as Blue.

I mean that sincerely. You are lame. Which, incidentally, is what Blue will be if the vet has to amputate his leg tomorrow.

Sincerely,
Me

 Reasons why Julie is going back to practicing law

Reason Number One:I like dress clothes. Unlike (by my scientific calculations) the majority of my authorly peers, I do not like wearing sweat pants. Or sweatshirts. Or flannel pajama bottoms. Or tee shirts. Or jeans, even, unless they are designer and paired with high heels. In the writing world, this is odd. If asked to list the top 5 perks of being an author, almost all writers will put “working in my pajamas”–if not at the very top–somewhere close.

Not me! I liketo get dressed up every day. And (according to my mother’s calculations), I only have 5 more years before I turn into a shriveled old hag who should spend her days hiding in a dark house, interacting only with cats.* So, with my vanity-clock tick-tock, tick-tocking away, I have succumbed to the pressure of joining the “real” world.

* With proper plastic surgery and regular maintenance, this deadline could be extended 10- 15 years.     

Reason Number Two: Hurry up and Wait. Publishing involves a mind boggling, soul-crushing amount of waiting. And rejection. And waiting. And rejection. Did I mention rejection? From the editor who phones you up to discuss your “great” story idea then falls off the face of the earth to the editor who won’t even look at a manuscript that isn’t paranormal, surviving the publishing industry requires an incredible amount of mental fortitude. And while skin can definitely be toughened (I know mine has), it’s a rare person who can withstand the ebbs and flows of the publishing waters alone. That’s why writing organizations like Romance Writers of America  are indispensable to the serious writer. They are wonderful sources not only for information, but emotional support. And for some, that’s all it takes. A few good friends, an understanding critique partner, several pounds of chocolate and the bad cover or careless rejection or whatever is bothering them is dealt with and forgotten. Me? Not so much. Because I have to obsess. Not that I would ever admit to the obsessing, and certainly I’d rather die than confront someone (like the editor who fell off the face of the earth). I’m waaaay to southern for that. I’m a silent obsessor, which is a quick way to wrinkles and nervous tics. Unless I am too busy to obsess. Hence, practicing law.

Reason Number Three: Because what better way to get new material to write about? Duh.